Do it afraid.
Do it afraid. That’s what Avery, my trusted and talented tarot reader, said one of my themes would be this year and WOW was she right.
I had the honor of co-facilitating a really fun workshop with Hipline last month and was so nervous leading up to it. By the time I was headed to the venue, I was sick of myself and the spiral I was at the bottom of. Logically, I was locked in. I had the information, I had the experience, but the fact that this was my first time facilitating in-person? Terrifying. What if it wasn't perfect? They say:
“Perfectionism is the fear of rejection in disguise.”
..and they’re right. As humans, we’re wired for connection. Yes, even hyper-independent folks like myself. Sometimes a fear of rejection can look like retreating into my cave, or my head, and telling myself that I need my alone time. And I do need my alone time, however, when I think about the why, it’s layered.
So what happens when I emerge for the world to have at me? When I’m being 100% myself and sharing something I’m in love with? When I’m vulnerable and open and raw and susceptible to criticism and hard feelings? My sense of safety feels threatened and I run every worst case scenario possible through my mind to prepare and protect myself. EXHAUSTING to say the least.
“How do I surrender?” I thought. Instead of continuing to grasp for an unattainable sense of control, I let go by telling myself the truth; It won’t be perfect but it will be good. Good was guaranteed. I knew I would do my best. I knew I was equipped. I knew if I got through this, I would be better for it. More resilient. More experienced and less afraid next time.
When I walked in, a sense of calm washed over me. I wasn’t nervous anymore. I finally allowed myself to be excited about this seed I planted, years ago, finally sprouting. I asked for this. And guess what? It was good. Real good.
Let’s work together!
I would love to hold space for you and your group using astrology with a health and wellness spin. My goal is to make astrology easy, practical and applicable to your everyday life. Together we’ll review the current celestial cycles and the recommended wellness practices for seasonal support. Reply to this email with any questions :)
See you next week with a Pisces season photo dump!
With intention,
:) Ferris
“If we take care of the moments, the years will take care of themselves.”-Maria Edgeworth